"So, what's the verdict?" I ask.
"You have fluid around your knee. It's compressing the joint. That's where the pain is originating, I would think. How did you do that, again?"
"My dog tripped me. Swear. So, I will be getting pain killers?"
"If you can't you manage with some Aleve."
"No. No way. You don't understand. If I could manage with Aleve, I wouldn't be here. I prefer Lortab because other things tend to upset my stomach. Not that I take other things on a regular basis."
"Uh huh."
"I mean, I've taken them, but only when prescribed. And not in a long time. Well, I got something after I had Harmony, but, hell, I just shit out a baby, so I don't think that counts. I mean, I'm not taking them to get high or anything."
"Mmm hmm."
"They do help me sleep. Not that I'm using them for a sleep aid. It's just that my knee hurts when I don't have anything and a glass of wine - NO! I won't be drinking and mixing pain killers with it! I promise! I know you people are leery of giving codeine scrips and I understand."
"You do?"
"Oh, sure, people get addicted all the time. Codeine is very addictive. From what I understand. I don't know for sure. I wouldn't know."
"Mmm."
"You're not writing me a prescription, are you?"
"No."
Links Of The Week
- Crystal
- I have a girl, Virginia, who is nine and a boy, Devon, who is sixteen and baby Harmony is this many (2). I'm married to Chris. My kids fervently hope they're adopted.
Dr Pepper Fund
by ruby & roja
For a good time, call Leesa. Or if it's fantastic web design, hosting and phenomenal customer service you want, go
here:
GC Web Hosting
Posts
Comments
-
►
2009
(85)
-
►
October
(10)
- Technically, It's Already Thursday
- Second Chance, INTERIM
- Second Chances
- Questions That I Really Don't Want To Know The Ans...
- Optimistic
- He's The Blonde In Our Relationship
- Sunny days seem to hurt the most I wear the pain...
- Maybe I'm A Little Too Fanatical
- New Read
- My Girls and a Giveaway. In That Order.
-
►
October
(10)
51 comments:
OUCH
You need to find a rheumatologist or, preferably, a pain management doctor who has an Indian (dots, not feathers) name. I don't know what it is about the Indians and pain management but all the ones I have gone to have prescribed Vicodin/Lortab/Norco or whatever you desire. They'll give you whatever you want if you've got the money or insurance.
How do I know? I have two herniated disks and he'll have a prescription written before he ever walks in the room. I've got several that expired before I needed them. Both doctors I've seen did this before they had ever gotten x-rays or MRIs on me.
I certainly don't recommend this unless anyone truly needs it but there are doctors that are pretty fast and loose with their perscription pads. And most of them have names with 18 consonants in a row and went to medical school in Bangladesh. That's how you find them.
Be forewarned: you'll feel like you need a shower when you leave because a lot of people there don't really have pain problems and are just there for a prescription. It's like sitting in a methadone clinic with everyone rubbing their arms and their eyes half-open just waiting to get in the back.
This happened to my favorite horse. We had to put him down. I have the number to my vet. Did you need it?
There's a nice little doctor out here in Vegas that has NO problem writing prescriptions for 120 lortabs per month. Soma too. He's a great guy. I love him more than life.
Surprisingly he's not indian.
Oh, last month when I saw him, Flava Flav was in the office getting his script too :)
how's that aleve tasting right about......now?
Too bad this didn't happen before I went on vacation. You can buy anything in Mexico without a prescription. A-ny-thing! Trust me. I just didn't have a need.
zowie lol
Hoo boy, Crystal, I love you so much!
Yeeeeeah this is the exact conversation I had with the "doc that lasered my uterus". I got no Vicodin.
I didn't tell the docs anything about how I like the warm fuzzy feeling that comes with percocet. He asked which I would prefer, vicodin or Percocet...I said, "I've had percocet before, no bad reactions, so let's stick with that, 'kay? Oh...and by the way, can you make that a refillable???" Didn't work...have only one left from my hysterectomy 3 months ago...it's my precious....
you KILL me
yeah I know all about how they screen for 'drug seekers'
this is fucking funny
lololol
That is so funny! I was just in the ER last night for pulling a muscle in my neck. I got the same kind of looks and questions.
"Yes, I pulled my muscle by waking up too fast. I'm stupid. I'm also paying $150 for the privledge of sitting here feeling like an ass. Give me drugs, please."
I think that all moms should get a neverending prescription for the narcotic of their choice upon giving birth. Just kidding, of course, but seriously... we should. he he
By the way, hi. LOL I'm Shana.
I found your blog a couple of days ago and I can't stop reading. I love it!!
Take it from a nurse, it is never a good idea to suggest what pain killer you would like to have prescribed!
The truly sad thing is that I only know that because they gave me Percocet after I had my gall bladder out and it made me sick as hell, so I was only trying to avoid that. Now, I'm in agony, my appointment with the orthopedist isn't until next week and I can't even get a weeks supply of Lortab BECAUSE OF ALL THE FUCKING JUNKIES.
Ugh. If I lived in California, I would SO be traveling across the border right now.
God I couldnt remember my login info for the life of me to comment this...
Anyways this blog made me laugh and I totally feel for you. I have 4 vicodins I saved, I'll never looses those. lol I live in Southern California and I always go to TJ Mexico, but everytime I see the drugs sold over there Im affaird to purchase one and end up gettin some other drug that has me growin a third nipple... tempting though.
ROFL...silence is golden, Crystal. Just blink some tears into your eyes and say, "It hurts. Bad."
That is, if they don't already have an index card on you that says "Crystal McKee, aka Crystal McKnob. Redhead with big hooters. Likes Lortab or Vicodin. DO NOT DISPENSE!"
my sympathies. after the SECOND time i broke my kneecap (i'm a terminal klutz) i had the surgery and they fixed it. it still aint right, but i can bend it now.
knee pain is bad shit. love your blog, it kept me snickering all night the weekend i was blessedly ALONE with the suppository puppies. (yes, that is self explainitory.)
Dang knee pain and no drugs???
That just isn't fair. I'm sorry for you~ we could all take up a donation...I've got 2 vicodines and 1 generic something or other that really sends me on a loop....you might like that....I know I do :-0
Tee hee hee.... yeah, I might have something laying around the house I could send ya... hahaha...
You poor dear.
hahahahaha, tooooo funny. Sounds like me with all the rationalizing and 'splainin *grin*
And mix wine with drugs? NEVER. hehe
Poor Baby, you need a different Doc. One who knows you and your profession and background. I've known my Primary Care doc for 20+ yrs. He knows when I'm in pain I friggin' MEAN it. He also knows that I've had enough pain over the years from different injuries and surgeries I know what drugs and muscle relaxers work for which parts of my body.
Hopefully, your ortho-guy will be more understanding.
*laughs* That sucks, it's funny but it sucks. I feel you on the knee pain.
Teehee! what is it about asking for pain medicine that turns us into blubbering idiots? Even after I had a c-section and my doctor asked me if I needed another prescription, I said no!!! WTF???
God, I hate how they won't give you pain meds unless something is hanging by a tendon, and then they only give you enough to get you to the point where the pain doesn't make you scream, but only whimper.
I'm always tempted to tell a doc that his job is to prescribe and it's my job to go cold turkey, so just write the damn scrip.
This is hilarious!!!! LOL
My doctor won't give me shit but my dentist? I love him! Who cares that all the fillings he puts in don't really stop the pain and fall out in a few months? He gives me a prescription for enough Vicodin to make it all worth while.
I socked those bad boys away.
I'd be willing to toss a few in the donation basket for you.
**We all sound like a bunch of junkies.**
I woulda given you the prescription!!! But that's just cuz I'm a fine upstanding young guy....
Or insane.. whatever..
I'd give ya the script...
I love percocet...love it...love it.
I have some I have been saving for an emergency. I can send them to you....no, wait. Forget that.
You are too funny. I just discovered your blog yesterday and I can't get enough.
That is funny chit. I can relate, me and my wife have each had two back surgeries in the last 4 years, so we have lortab and soma by the box. The lortab is also great when you get the tickly cough and cant sleep at night when you have a cold, just take a razor, slice a eighth of a 750 or 500 an hour before bedtime, you will sleep right through the night, it deadens the cough center.
Pull a Rush "No Druggie" Limbaugh, shop around, get some scripts, then fill them out under false names. LOL
Oh, yeah. Percocet. Good stuff. Too good.
After my injury, the doctor gave me 90 Percocets a month. After two months, I told him I would like to go back to Lortab. Percocet is much more addictive and it made me feel almost depressed as it was wearing off. I'll still get it occasionally when I get a bad flare-up but I only ask for about 15 because that's a road you don't want to go down.
Also had 5 80 mg Oxycontin once after knee surgery. Synthetic heroin. Those 5 caused me to have withdrawals when they were gone. But it's by far the best painkiller I've ever had. Makes you feel bulletproof for about an hour and then you fall asleep. That's probably why the hoodlums will whack you over the head if they think you have them and it's why pharmacies don't carry them. You have to special order them.
Ok.
So, the genius FNP said no to the Lortab (even though I only asked for enough to get me through to my orthopedic appt next week), but the doctor decided to call in 50 Ultram. I googled this shit and EVERYONE is addicted to it. Plus, you can't breastfeed AT ALL. So I called the pharmacist and told him to put it back where he found it.
Bah.
So when I had my daughter via emergency c-section, I had been in the hosptial for three weeks on bedrest. I had some serious pain during my pregnancy, and I'm allergic to a lot of the narcodic's. So when I get wheeled back up from the er, my dr followed me in and said, "what do you want?" I immediately reply, 1mg of Dilaudid every 4 hours by IV. He says, "done" the nurses looked at both him and me like I was nuts.
Damn, it feels good when you have a dr that knows you so well, that he doesn't even hesitate to give you what you want.
This is the first time I've read your blog, and it has me laughing. I cannot get "Mother's Little Helper" out of my head. Haha
Damn doctors!
Man, I must be a walking pharmacy. I've got bottles and bottles of Ultram in my medicine cabinet. I don't even hide it like I do the others. I usually do research before I take anything and don't remember Ultram being addictive. It never gave me a problem at all. Nor did it work. My doctor doesn't even consider it a narcotic in the sense that he will give you all of that you want.
One side note that I remember about Ultram: it's supposedly highly sought after by people wanting to lose weight. I read that most people will lose 40-60 pounds if they change nothing else and if they take a high enough dose regularly.
Crystal, you mentioned going across the border - they won't usually sell you anything "good" without a prescription. Besides, you get searched at the border, and they will straight throw out any narcotics you don't have a script for. I live in Tucson, and I go across for my weight loss meds (40 bucks cheaper!), and already asked about the good stuff...
Me, that sounds like a good reason to hold on to your old script bottles. I hold on to mine (the ones that could be useful) so that I don't have to haul my huge 120 count Lortabs while away for a long weekend. Carrying them in a baggie doesn't look good but if I have an old bottle, the cops wouldn't harass me too much. I'm going on a cruise later this year where I'll be stopping in many countries including Cozumel, Mexico.
Does anyone have any specific knowledge of that situation? Do returning cruises have to go through customs or will I be able to take my backpack stuffed with Oxycontin, Demerol, Morphine, reds, greens, plant life from our previous stop (Jamaica) and maybe a little Viagra to counteract the Oxycontin?
College was a long time ago and I haven't had any "contacts" since I graduated. I've got to make up for lost time and the Bahamas, Jamaica, and Cozumel sound like the right place to do it as long as it won't be taken away from me when I get back.
Mmmmm...painkillers...
Speaking as a nurse....best way to get the pain medication is to not ask for it by name. The docs get a lot lot lot lot lot of that and the DEA is ALL over them. An area doc was carried out of his office in handcuffs just this week. That's why they're cutting back. The level of addiction and abuse (not to mention the street value) out there is staggering and unfortunately it's the ones who truly do need it who suffer. But asking for it by name sends up huge red flags to them.
Just an FYI.
LOVE your blog, btw. :)
Love the blog! Found it thanks to the Blog awards! You got my vote!
Anywhoo, I wish I could send you some of the vicodin I used to get. I have severely cystic ovaries and had a bottomless script for vicodin when I was 16. My doctor loved me. I cut myself off when my mom starting selling them and refilling it twice a week though lol.
sicksiteradio 1-866-325-SICK
sicksiteradio 1-866-325-SICK
sicksiteradio 1-866-325-SICK
sicksiteradio 1-866-325-SICK
sicksiteradio 1-866-325-SICK
sicksiteradio 1-866-325-SICK
sicksiteradio 1-866-325-SICK
sicksiteradio 1-866-325-SICK
sicksiteradio 1-866-325-SICK
anime, animme, 徵信, 徵信社, 外遇, 徵信, 徵信社, 外遇, 情趣用品, 情趣用品, 免費a片, a片, 免費av, 色情影片, 情色, 情色網, 色情網站, 色情, 成人網, 成人圖片, 成人影片, 18成人, av, av女優, 性, 情慾, 走光, 做愛, sex, H漫, 免費a片, a片, 免費av, 色情影片, 情色, 情色網, 色情網站, 色情, 成人網, 成人圖片, 成人影片, 18成人, av, av女優, 性, 情慾, 走光, 做愛, sex, H漫, a片, 離婚, 抓姦, 外遇蒐證, 外遇抓姦, 外遇, 侵權, 仿冒, 應收帳款, 工商徵信, 美姬情趣網, 情趣風情, 中部人情趣網, 台北情趣用品, 情人節禮物, 成人情趣用品, 一夜情趣用品情趣, 情境坊歡愉用品, 情人視訊網, 美姬成人用品, 情人花束, 按摩棒, 情人歡愉用品, 成人視訊, 交友愛情用品館, 視訊交友, 情人視訊網, 成人視訊交友, 情趣交友, 美姬用品專賣, 高雄轉角, 情趣用品, 情趣用品, 辣妹視訊, 情色論壇, 情惑用品性易購, 紅煙論壇, 高雄轉角, 情趣用品, 性感睡衣, 免費視訊聊天, 視訊交友網, 美姬圖影, 紅煙論壇, 交友聊天室, 海角七號, 美姬圖影, 紅煙論壇, 成人視訊交友, 上班族聊天室, 情人節禮物, 高雄轉角, 情趣用品, 同志聊天室情書, 聊天室交友, 中部人聊天室, 情惑用品, 性易購, 紅煙論壇, 高雄轉角, 情趣用品,
酒店經紀人,
菲梵酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
禮服酒店上班,
酒店小姐兼職,
便服酒店經紀,
酒店打工經紀,
制服酒店工作,
專業酒店經紀,
合法酒店經紀,
酒店暑假打工,
酒店寒假打工,
酒店經紀人,
菲梵酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
禮服酒店上班,
酒店經紀人,
菲梵酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
禮服酒店上班,
酒店小姐兼職,
便服酒店工作,
酒店打工經紀,
制服酒店經紀,
專業酒店經紀,
合法酒店經紀,
酒店暑假打工,
酒店寒假打工,
酒店經紀人,
菲梵酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
禮服酒店上班,
酒店小姐兼職,
便服酒店工作,
酒店打工經紀,
制服酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
菲
梵,
Post a Comment